If only I could take back the things I say and do in anger. It is no excuse, maybe it is time to get some anger management sorted out because this is not the first time I've overstepped certain boundaries. You drive me crazy, in good ways mainly but occasionally when it is in a bad way, snap. This is not a statement of it being your fault in anyway, it is about how much more vulnerable I am to you and yours, surprising considering how ambivalent I usually am about external opinion.
With you, the highs are higher and the lows are lower. It is a matter of choosing a life with not too much variability, a nice constant wave with softly rising hills and shallow valleys or the crazy roller-coaster we are on with insane happiness and intense sorrow. When things are going good, we are amazing! When they are not, we worse than suck... Those who know are telling me to step away, but they do not understand your brand of magic and the kind of optimism I cling on too. Things have been too beautiful and good for me to want to step away so easily. Nobody else has used such horrible words on me or made me feel so crappy about myself but nobody else summons rainbows. Hownowbrowncow?
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